Hi, my name is Laura and I’m afraid of commitment.
There I said it.
Yes, me, Ligos comma Laura, is afraid of commitment. Crap, it sounds bad to say outloud but it’s the cold hard truth.
I am also terrified of making a decision. Not because I don’t know what I want but it’s because I always believe I’m going to let someone down or hurt someone’s feelings. This indecisiveness and lack of commitment actually does more harm than if I did make a decision and hurt someone’s feelings.
Ugh, writing that down makes me so annoyed and also frustrates me to know that at 30 I STILL feel like I have to please everyone around me. What can I say? I’ve been a people pleaser with rebel tendencies all my life, it’s a catch-22 and I’m constantly fighting the battle of doing what I want to do while also trying to make sure everyone is happy along the way.
What ACTUALLY happens along the way is I’m left not fully happy and fulfilled and others around me are used to walking all over me, turning me down (without fear of letting me down), and having the final say.
No, no, no! That’s not how any of this works!
Why do I bring this up?! Well, I was lucky enough to attend the Influencer Summit at Expo East 2018 and had the pleasure of hearing Michelle Poler speak. She talked about her journey to 100 Days of Fear. I was blown away by her courage and her words of wisdom, it was like she was talking righ to me (even though there were 100 of us in the room.
She realized FEAR was holding her back. Holy cow, you’re not kidding. While I might not be afraid of heights, cliff jumping, oysters, or other fears she tackled, I sure do have the fear of hurting others. This holds me back ALL THE TIME. So, I thought to myself, what would I commit to for 100 days that would be REALLY hard for me.
100 Days of…
Content & putting myself out there.
Yep, it seems simple but it’s exactly what I need to push through a totally personal and professional block. I even posted this quote from the amazing Rachel Hollis on Instagram yesterday:
Confession: I do this ALL THE TIME. I make promises to myself that I break. Why? Because I know that I’ll forgive myself and move on. However, it’s self-sabotage and makes me feel like complete garbage. Enough is enough.
I’ve been talking about it on Instagram (and here) but I’m still half in. I’m still half scared that i’ll let someone down in the process and it’s not making me happy. So, here’s what I’m committing to (guys this is a huge deal):
Posting content DAILY for 100 Days
It seems simple but I know for me it’s going to be hard. I’ve noticed that when I am consistent, I have more clients, more readers, and more impact. I stop posting because I worry that I’m not getting anywhere. Welp here goes nothing. 100 uninterrupted days of content here on the blog & on Instagram. I’m scared as all heck which means this is the right move.*GULP*
Michelle said something along the lines of: you either move forward in growth or fall back into comfort…I’m sick of comfort and ready for growth. Bring it on.
What would you commit to for 100 Days?
Comment below I want to know!
PS. I’m not sure if I could’ve timed this any better but 100 Days takes me to January 1st, if that ain’t perfect timing, I don’t know what is!